2012/11/12

Still here!

Been a while since I updated..
I guess I haven't really had much to say...

I'm still pregnant and getting bigger by the minute.. But it's not bothering me as much any more. I updated my weight on myfitnesspal and I am still 3 lbs under the weight I was before I got pregnant.. But I don't really care about that either..

I had a check-up with this doctor at the hospital (they send women with BMI over 30 to them) - and he told me my pregnancy had been going much better than they expected. I haven't gained weight, my blood work is good, the baby is growing the way he is supposed to, and he is strong and healthy.. They will however induce me if he isn't born on his due date, which means if he isn't out he will be by Dec 4th!

My baby is healthy and perfect.. My hubby loves me more than anything on this earth.. What more could I really ask for?

I mean, I am not happy with my body or my weight as it is today.. But I can see that the way I think of weight, losing weight ect is different.. This pregnancy has thought me that my body isn't working against me cause it wants me to feel horrid.. Of course, I have bad days.. Of course I have days where I HATE the way I feel about it.. But it's not its fault.. I did this to my body, and it will not change unless I change..

I have days where I think about my bad days with binges and purging, and you know what.. I can say for sure that those days are behind me.. The days where I would think of starving to get short term results.. The days where I would blame my body being against me.. They are behind me.. I'm not saying I wont have bad days.. I know I will.. But it is just different now..

My plan is still to start on my "diet" starting new years.. To begin with my focus will be to keep my portions under control, and to eat clean. I still aim to reach my goal by end of next year, but I also will take it step by step..

I was looking at some old pictures.. And in those pictures my weight was halfway what my goal is.. But in those days - I didn't really worry.. I went to the gym.. I ate.. I was partying a whole lot.. But I didn't care.. I felt like I was the sexiest woman walking around.. That is what I want to go back to.. I want to feel good about my self.. I am tired of not being happy with me..

Any who..

I will let you guys know when the little guy is here.. And I will do my best to put up more updates, but I doubt I will have the chance to before I start the new plan..

My mother is going to come and stay with us for a week mid December (Lord have mercy lol).. And my gran (well she isn't really my gran, but she is the closest family member I have) - is going to stay with us during Christmas and new year.. Along with a new born baby our weeks will be pretty packed the upcoming few weeks! My bff and her family will also be visiting the first or second week of January for a long weekend, but that is still some time away :)

I want you all to keep taking care of your self, and I am doing my best to comment on blogs.. I do read most of your posts though..

<3

6 comments:

  1. If you think about it, if you're 3lbs under then you're really more under that because baby hasn't stayed the same weight or size. Have you picked out a name for him yet?

    Good luck with Christmas and New Year; it sounds hectic! If we don't hear from you before- good luck also with the birth :) He's going to be gorgeous xx

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  2. You're amazing! I can't believe you haven't gained! If we don't hear from you before then I hope you have a quick and simple birth and have a wonderful holiday season with your family :)
    If you need any company in your healthy post baby weight loss challenge I'm only and email away! xxx

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  3. Glad you are taking care of yourself. You are going to be so on it after you have the baby on your knew diet. I know it. Seeing that you can gain all this weight which is still less then what you were for a baby and eating good meals has been so good for you.

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  4. Oh my gosh, less than a month to go!
    Congrats on everything going well!
    And it's great that you're thinking positively about your body. I'm so happy for you :D

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  5. It's amazing how a pregnancy can make people realize things and mature :) <3

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  6. Can't believe your little guy is due so soon! And you've really done amazing well. Not gaining during pregnancy? That is an accomplishment. So many women use it as excuse to eat what ever they want and overeat because it's "for two" or it's "what the baby wants." But you stuck to being healthy for you and the baby. Way to go!

    Thanks for the encouraging comments by the way. You are so right about this job. It's breathing room to find something I do want. And there is no reason to listen to gossips in the office. Thanks!

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