Been a while..

I'm sorry for being so much MIA lately.. I just don't know what to post... On one hand I have a hard time wrapping my head anything but the baby - and being pregnant.. On the other hand I do have a whole lot of thoughts about the things I want to do after the baby is out (with my weight, health ect) but I feel like a dork talking about it when it's so far away.. But anyways :) Here it goes...

I am looking more and more forward to end of this year - having the baby here with us - and next year and the changes it will bring. I think it will be a very different journey than anything I have been on before.. And it is very very scary.. But I think.. I hope.. That I/we will be fine..

What do you guys think of the name Caspian for our baby boy?? And no please don't say Prince Caspian from the chronicles of Narnia.. As some of you might remember I am Persian, living in the Nordics and I really wanted our boy to have a name that can be related with Persia, but also one that doesn't sound weird to the nordics. We also have a VERY nordic last name - so I wanted the first name to be a tad more me.. Caspian is related to the Caspian Sea which is a landlocked sea in north-west Asia ( north of Iran) which was named after the ancient Caspians (or Caspis) who used to live on its shore. My grandmother from my dads side, and my grandfather from my mothers side both have their roots from that area. So it's not a randomly picked name .. I also like that the name is special and that there wont be 100s of other guys with the same name as our baby boy.

Over to something else. I saw this video the other day - and I really loved it.. If you have the time - it really is worth having a look.  The clips name is "hungry for change" .. So if the link doesn't work - you should be able to find the whole thing on youtube. :)

I have lately been looking more and more into how to cure my body using food.. I mean.. We all eat food.. We all have had our issues with food.. It has for years been an enemy.. Wouldn't it be amazing to become friend with food and use it to live a healthy life?? At times it seems like a dream... But I mean lets face it, there are way too many people who has done it - why wouldn't I be able to do the same?? The main point.. The main reason why I think these things can work is because there is no food abuse.. There are no diets.. The main rule is to eat what your body needs, give it nutrients for it to feel full and for it to be able to heal..

This pregnancy has been hard.. And I think it would have been so much easier if I had a normal and healthy relationship with food and my body - and with my mind.. I really don't wish the state of mind I have been to any others.. And if I was to give an advice to anyone who is thinking about getting pregnant it would be this:

  • Have a healthy relationship with food and your body
  • Have a healthy state of mind where you don't hate your body and the changes that it will have
  • Make sure to be in a healthy weight/BMI range
Don't misunderstand me.. I am really looking forward to have this baby here.. But I wish I had been a better place with my self, so I could enjoy the journey more.

My hubby and I have been talking more and more lately.. And I have been trying my best to be open to him about what is on my mind.. And it's starting to feel so much easier.. I am really happy to have you girls around for when I need to vent - cause you girls always understand.. But I must admit that things are starting to feel so much "lighter" now that I can talk to him.. He still doesn't understand it all.. He still get the "OMG you what" look on his face from time to time.. But now I know.. I don't have to carry it all alone.. I know that I don't need to worry about my eating habits/issues around the baby cause he will be there to notice if something is wrong. And I know he will be there to help and support me on getting healthy even if he doesn't always like the idea of it. It is a weird feeling.. To have someone really care about me.. My health.. My body.. It's so so weird..

This is another page I have been on more and more lately - It is an amazing page if someone is looking into clean eating - and to rehab the body with food.

At the moment.. I am mostly doing research and are working on my mind and how to befriend food.. I don't want to do any drastic change while I am pregnant, but my thoughts are to get on these things starting new year.. If any of you have any other similar pages/books ect I should look into, feel free to let me know :)

Anywho.. I'm gonna finish up for now.. Take good care of you all ladies..



  1. Caspian is a beautiful name!

    I'm trying so hard to have a healthy relationship with food. But a lifetime of disordered eating is not cured over night.

    Be gentle with yourself,
    Baby (pun intended) steps,
    Be kind to yourself

    Love to you and baby x

  2. I think Caspian is a lovely name.

    Having someone to talk too these things about in real life can be the most freeing things sometime. Just having someone who loves you and cares about you but can listen and understand too :)

  3. communication at it's finest! Glad you have found a way to be more open with hubby. It seems to already have made such a huge difference in your own sense of well being. Can't wait to read more about your adventures in mommy hood!

  4. BTW-Caspian is a cool name. Here the kid would probably get teased about it but I don't know what it's like where you are. Sadly, potential "weirdness factor" is something to consider b/c we know how mean kids can be.

  5. I really love the idea of using food to heal the body instead of harm it (which is what I do everytime I binge).


  6. Caspian is a beautiful name. That being said, I bet a lot of people will associate it with the Narnia character, especially since that film is pretty recent and the books are classics.
    The idea of healthful eating is great- I think everyone wants to achieve that. But I'm sure you're finding that it's MUCH easier said than done. I hope it works for you! You can do it, and now that talking to your husband is getting easier, you have the additional support to help!
    Take care!

  7. I like Caspian. It's unique.

    Aww, you and hubby are cute! And I'm glad you have his support. Everything will be OK darling Kitty!

  8. I made an account on that site last year and really want to do the juice fast but have never got around to it. Did you watch the associated movie? It's called Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead. It was such an eye opener!