I am so fed up with being sick.. I have been coughing for freaking two weeks now.. Saw the doctor yesterday - and she said "it will pass".. WTF lol... I am sure it will - but the question is WHEN!!
I have been home since the trip to Oslo - and she told me to stay in until next Monday.. I am going crazy... I mean I do like having time off - but being stuck at home - coughing is not what I like to spend my time on.. *sigh*
And on top of that .. I am so freaking angry lately.. I keep having these angry dreams about my socalled family - and I wake up feeling more pissed.. And I just sometimes really want to call up some of them and tell them how they make me feel..
I still haven't heard from my "sister" after I told her I was pregnant.. That was ermm what .. Over 2 months ago... And my mother.. She is being her usual self.. She is just so full of her self, and why the fuck does it always have to be about her? .. Now she has grown a sudden "love" for this baby - and she talks about how she is going out buying stuff.. And is having opinions about what my baby needs.. And I have been trying to be as polite as possible - trying to explain how the stuff she thinks is what we need isn't what we actually need.. and that if she wants to spend money, she could get some of the things we actually do need.. But does she listen?? Ofc not.. She never has.. Why would she now..
And get this.. She doesn't want the kid to call her for grandma.. It makes her feel old.. What the fucking fuck is that all about??? *sigh* She said "I don't know how I feel about someone calling me grandma, so we should find out what the baby is going to call me" ... Oh did I mention she has decided to come visit? She is coming in two weeks, even after I told her that it was our vacation time, and we were planning to take a trip somewhere - and she decided that we could do it AFTER she has been here..
Why the hell does she asks if it is OK for her to visit when she is just going to ignore what I say?? I am so sick of them.. All of them.. Oh and lol ... She is planning for my kid to stay with her for some weeks every summer lol.. As if that is ever fucking going to happen.. She fucked up the 3 of us.. and she thinks I will let my kid be alone with her.. EVER???? She is just so fucking clueless.. And I am so sick of trying to keep the peace and be nice.. But what else can I do???
I just wish that she could open her eyes and see what she is doing.. I just wish that I could have a normal talk with her without it depressing me for days.. And sometimes.. I just wished they didn't exist.. My life would have been so much happier and easier without them.. *sigh*...
I'm sorry for this but I am just so fed up..
Sounds like your mum is trying to be a good grandparent because she was not the best of mums?
ReplyDeleteIs she staying the whole two weeks? That would drive me crazy. I dont mind staying with mine for two weeks but its totally different when they come here lol.
Your last post about your baby having hicups is the cutest thing iv ever heard! Congrats by the way :) x
Thanks :)
DeleteNo she is not going to stay with us for two weeks.. She is not allowed. She isn't trying to be a good grandparent.. she always just wants to show to other people that she cares.. Not that she really does.
You know you have the power to have a life without your family in it right? If they really cause you THIS much pain then perhaps you would be happier? Having said that family can be a blessing... so I'm told so there is most likely some love and good hidden under than frustrated rant, perhaps you could try focusing on that while she's over and try to have a chat or slip some not so subtle hints in about what you and your child will want and need from her? Better to be clear now than to get into massive arguments later i think. & the grandma thing is crap- she just can't deal with the fact she's ageing, your buba should be able to call her anything... are your husband's parents normal?
ReplyDeleteI really hope you feel better soon! Being sick sucks, have you tried just taking a whole day off? you know, curling up in bed or on the couch and doing nothing but watching movies and napping with a hot tea. That always seems to help me get better faster.
Sending you healing loving vibes xxx
I'm sorry to hear that..
ReplyDeleteIt's fat too me! I used to be 63 kg for a while, I cant even fit in those clothes right now! Getting back on track, and thank you for your support <3
Stevia and other fake sugars are fine. It's just the "normal" sugar thats make my stomach sad :P