2013/05/26

Up and down!

First I want to explain the weird post some of you commented. I did make the post about wanting a divorce and moving to Norway - but after TK made a comment on it I removed the post..

Having it out here made it way to real - and that is a feeling I do want to act on. My relationship is having more lows than ups lately.. I am annoyed and screaming at hubby a whole lot.. Almost everything he does bugs me - but I also know that he doesn't mean any harm - and boys will be boys.. I am also sure that the PPD is playing a good part on it all.

On the bright side - I am starting to feel better. My mood is lightning and I think the depression is over (well as over as it can be for me lol) .. Our argues have been less the last couple of days and even though he still does a bunch of stupid things (like not washing his hands before he preps the formula for the kid) I am not off the edge because of it. So this one time, it wasn't blogger being weird, I actually removed the post :) Thank you so much for caring so much.. You make me feel less lonely :)

As far as my PT plan goes, it hasn't been going so well.. It hasn't been a priority due to several things.. On other hand I have also had the chance to practice some of the PT's advice and have been able to adjust it to fit my daily rutine better. I think part of the reason why he wanted me to drink that insane amount of water is to feel more full - so what I do is that I drink a large glass of water before each meal and when ever I feel hungry before/instead of munching on something. The drinking 2 glasses of water for each cup of coffee is out - but I only drink a cup a day so I don't feel bad about it. Also instead of having half a liter of water with lemon in the morning, I just drink a large glass of water with lemon in it. Half a liter made me feel so sick and I wasn't able to take care of the baby for like 30 mins after cause I felt so sick.. And lets be honest, I can not , not focus on the baby in the early morning.

Walking for 30 mins twice a days doesn't really fit my days either. I go for a stroll with the baby almost every mid day for 1-2 hours.. So I am sticking to that instead of parting it in two small walks. But I have been thinking that the reason why he probably wants me to part them is to get more activity during the day and I rather do something else instead. I am going to get out and remove the dust from my exercise DVDs and do those, or just WiiFit on the days where I'm tire - and try to do my best to hit the gym 3 times a week. But I must say I will be happy as long as I do 30 mins of something after the kid goes to bed.

I have also made the decision of cutting down on carbs now that I am eating less and less wheat. I am thinking that let my carbs only come from fruit/veggies after lunch. If I manage to stick to it, it will down my calories a whole lot.. (I tend to have a huge carb binge around dinner time... )

I have been avoiding the scale a whole lot lately.. I have been really bloated.. After I have had the baby and got my period back.. They have been hell.. I have cramps that remind me of the early stages of the delivery.. And I bleed a whole lot.. Sorry for the TMI btw.. Anyways, I made an appointment with the midwife that I went to for my check-ups while I was pregnant and had a check up just to see that nothing was wrong, and she said that everything looked fine - that it probably was my bodies reaction to getting the periods back.. I really hope it gets better soon cause I have never ever had period like this.. Did you guys btw know that you need to do a whole lot of Kegel exercises for your womanly parts to get back in the shape after birth? lol.. She said 3 times a day - 10 mins each time... So yeah... I have been doing them, but far from that much.. So yeah, gotta work on that too.. Anyways, getting back to my point, my period should be over by Tuesday, but I am getting on the scale tomorrow and starting from there again..

I have made this reminder with reasons why I want to do this on my cell phone and I am going to revisit it and add to the reasons every time I feel week or feel like I want to quit, or binge.. I need to learn that this should not be a diet, but a life style.. Making healthy choices, having smaller portions.. Staying active every day..

I need to be off now.. I will catch up with your blogs a little later today :) Hope you are having a great weekend!

<3



4 comments:

  1. I miss you and love you so much! I hope things with hubby get better! And that the diet stuff gets aligned well too!

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  2. an hour or two of walking with a baby is good exercise. I'd say it meets expectations.

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  3. Wow having a baby is so much more then just having a baby! I think you are doing great though working through everything. I hope things get better with the hubby. Hopefully more ups will start coming again. All relationships have that ebb and flow.

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  4. I also use my cellphone as a reminding tool to keep me on track. That much h2o can be a lot all at once but it does get easier and some days you might end up drinking even more! I try to drink 32oz before I get to work and another 32oz before I leave work. And I am sure your moods have been all over the place which makes marriage even harder but you being able to step back and realize that it is happening is a hugh help! I joke that when my cat annoys me I know it is me being crabby nothing else because how could he annoy me?
    I hope the begining of the week went well for you!

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