I had a great start to my week last week... I lost a bunch of weight, but then it went all to hell... And there is nothing to blame it on ex. from my lack of willpower..

I've decided to to make some changes... I mean.. My son turns 8 months tomorrow and I am fatter than ever.. My joints are aching, and the new thing is my knees.. I think my weight is finally getting to them too... *sigh*

The last few days I have actually been thinking about applying for a gastric bypass or whatever it's called.. The point of the matter is, that it wouldn't help.. I would probably be one of those people who get it, keep binging and gain all the weight back..

I'm going to do something about it.. I am not going to be one of those people.. I don't care how anymore.. I am just going to do it..

I have been taking chromium pills since last Monday and it has done wonders for my appetite and sugar cravings but the fatty that I am I have forced fed my self that last few days.. I have been so uncomfortable ... So full... But still... I just couldn't stop my self... Then I broke down and starting crying to hubby saying I will never lose the weight...

To make it short.. I am yet again fed up....

Anyways, my goals for the rest of this year are:

  • Hit the gym 5 times a week 
I don't care how long I stay there, and how much I exercise.. I am going to get my butt there... And I am thinking this way I should get used to go to the gym, and just do it...

  • No more "dinner"
I am not cutting out dinner, I am just cutting out dinner in the terms that I eat.. For me dinner means 1-2 HUGE plates of food where I stuff my face with LOADS of carbs.. My goal is to replace it with light options such as salads, soups, grilled veggies, fruits.

  • No eating after 8PM.
Who am I kidding... I keep doing good, and I go on a binge fest as soon as it's dinner time, and I just keep going.. I know there will be times where I will have late dinner due to family gatherings, but those are exceptions.. This is going to be the norm.. I know I will have days where I will feel like I HAVE to eat something, and for those days fruits, berries and air-popped popcorn are allowed..

I am unsure about a whole lot of things, but there is one thing I am sure of.. and that is that I will not give up until I have reached my goal.. One way or another... I will get there...


  1. willpower though
    food is so good who has the willpower to not eat it is the question
    :( i'm sorry about your joints and knees honey
    oh no. sfsfs can't imagine binging with a gastric bypass though
    would it not be uncomfortable
    just be aware: you know your body better than anyone and knows what works on it better than anyone. I was actually going to suggest you up your calories to prevent binging. I mean your allowance on MFP was something like 1200 and im just like "...wait, I can't live on 1200 calories at all". basically, I believe that if you cannot stay on the intake you're on for the rest of your life then there is something wrong with your intake.

    -Sam Lupin

  2. I don't think you should get surgery. It's not a fix-all, and it might make things worse considering the reasons you binge.
    Where is your hubby through all these attempts to lose weight? Enlist him into the fight! Make him go to the gym with you or hold you accountable. Tell him what you need and make him help you. He'll win in the end too because you'll look smoking hot and healthy :)

  3. I think I got confused somewhere along the way. You lost weight while you were pregnant right? Then afterwards gained? I know it's so hard Kitty. Food is seductive and powerful and sometimes it's all you can do not to eat it. Keep fighting it. You won't be satisfied until you finally conquer this. Just like me.

  4. I have very strong feelings about gastric bypass. One, it totally fucking works, you are forced to eat much smaller amounts of food for about a year at least. And you will drop the wt fast which helps your self esteem and health. It can be done in a healthy way. Two, if you want it to stick you must start therapy and figure out how not to use food as an emoitional crutch otherwise you go back to the same mistakes and that in itself is dangerous.
    My sister had it done and lost a lot of wt, but she never tackled the emoitional issues. It has been 8 years and she has gained back about 50 to 70% of her wt back. I knew this was going to be tough for her because she was unwilling to make changes in her life and now she is back on whatever fad diet she can find, looking for the next magical answer.
    If you can honestly deside to dig deep and really work at the behaviors that led you to use food emoitionally you can do it. It will be horrible and painful to work on but that is the key factor for true success with that surgery.
    I would also suggest talking to people who had it done with positive and negative results ad to professionals who love it and some who hate it. That way you would be making an informed choice.

  5. My advice? Do you want to lose weight fast or lose it forever? Don't do anything stupid just for the sake of getting skinnier faster.

    Go one step at a time! "This month I will start exercising 2 times a week and I will keep eating what I'm eating".

    Next month "This month I will exercise 3 times a week and keep eating what I'm eating".

    Then "This month I'll keep exercising 3 times a week and I will start a meal plan".

    This will help you actually do stuff. If you plan on doing it all at once, you might get overwhelmed by not being able to do it and then feel frustrated.



  6. I find that protein-dense dinners are working wonders. I stay full until bedtime and have stopped bingeing. I have as much meat as I want (which doesn't end up being a lot) and veggies and maybe a smoothie (I'm really low on calcium and my teeth are going to sht so I'm trying to up it with yoghurt/milk based smoothies

  7. I've been away and just caught up on a lot! 1. Beautiful flowers :) 2. Honey Boo Boo is a guilty pleasure of mine. I love it! Like a car crash you can't look away from! They live a few hours from my house. It's funny how a few hours can make such a big difference! 3. have you considered taking fiber supplements? I started taking them in pill form at breakfast, and it just kind of keeps your belly full during the day. I think km seeing results!