Dropping by..

Just give a quick update..

I have been back at work since Monday.. It has been OK, but I am really worn out and dead tired by the end of the day.. But being back at work has been good for my mood - so I am trying to stick to it and see how it goes.

Yesterday I got a whole bunch of post with different appointments. Tomorrow I have the appointment with the diabetes clinic.. I am really worried.. So lets keep them crossed.. *sigh*

Wednesday I have the first appointment to see a therapist. I am starting to look forward to that - I just hope that I click with the person I am going to meet.. Else there is no point of going there is it?

And last but not least I got the appointment for the ultrasound.. It's going the be June 18th.. So that isnt that far away :) Now that I am really looking forward to.. I hope we can see if it is a girl or a boy :)

I have been really good with my eats lately. I watch everything I eat.. I have said no to ALOT of cravings.. Stupidly enough I have cried a bunch over a whole lot of it too - mostly because I have been so worried.. But ya..

My weight is also normal.. I keep going up and down a pound but most days I am sticking to the low number. Still not aiming for it - it is just how it is.. I don't feel eating much - and when I eat I am really careful eating high fibre food - no added sugar ect.

My relationship with my family - aka my mum and my sisters isn't getting any better either.. My youngest sister hasn't even bothered to PM back after I told her I was pregnant.. That was erm... 1,5 month ago I think.. My mother.. Well you know the story.. What's new is that after I published that I was preggo on facebook she made a comment- and put the same as her status saying "God has blessed our family - I am going to become a grandmother".. Then a friend of her commented saying "congrats, I guess you will be visiting Sweden more now".. Wanna know what she said?? - She said "No, we will see, the plane fairs are high" .. WTF lol ..

I sometimes consider if I should just ignore them - and put them in my "people I know, but I don't want to think about" category.. I dunno.. It's not fair to the middle one.. She has been really nice - but I really can't bare the idea of even going to that town.. To that place.. Anything like that..


I hope you are all good..



  1. I wish you the best of luck with juggling all of your appointments, and I cannot wait to hear about the outcome of that ultrasound! :)
    Family can be great for you sometimes, but they can also be one of your biggest downfalls.
    I guess, in the end, you have to decide if it is better for them to be invested in your life, or if it is better to hold them as acquaintances.
    I mean, you are always going to love them, that is for sure, but sometimes you have to make tough decisions based on your own well-being, and no one else's.
    I hope you are able to work things out, my dear.
    Stay positive, stay beautiful. <3

  2. Don't expect a thing from your family. They consistently let you down and you'll have to separate yourself from it somehow to get over that pain they cause you. It's very sad. Glad to see you are back at work and up and about.

  3. I think boundaries are important with your family. They consistently let you down, and it seems like they make you feel more sad than anything else. If the middle one is nice, then build your relationship with her, and keep the other ones at a distance. I know Jillian Michaels have some really nice podcasts about setting boundaries. Good luck with the appointments petal, you know where to find me if you need to vent or anything <3 xx

  4. so glad to hear things are on the upswing for the most part. if you don't like the first therapist you see then move onto the next. it really is a trial by fire kind of thing but eventually you'll find the right person that you will connect with so don't give up if the first one doesn't click.
    great job watching your diet and i'm sure that your appointment at the diabetes clinic will go well because of it.
    family :( they really know how to manipulate our moods. your mom is your mom just try to make the most of it. delve into your relationship that is working with your middle sister and i bet in turn things will improve across the board with your family. i find that's what happens with my family relationships when i put a bit of effort into them. i've even use the *fake it till you make it* theory. if you start out faking it sometimes it actually helps. i was distant *emotionally* from them for quite a while but then i decided to give it a go. it pretty much works. i still fake it through but it seems to make life easier than living with the stress of it all. i guess maybe you could look at it like a duty/job for now and see what happens.

  5. ewww. work. what my aunt did was that she took her maternity leave after the baby's born. i'm guessing for you it's the same? :)
    ouch. that sounds like it sucks.
    really? interesting!
    :/ i hope so! *crosses fingers* i don't think you'll have any problems to be honest, sweetie.
    i hope so, too, sweetie! you are genuinely beautiful mind and spirit, so i hope the baby and you are well on your way! it takes a lot of courage to book a therapist appointment.
    ^_^ aweee. how adorable! they'll probably do an amnio for that. i think the baby isn't grown enough yet to see if the ultrasound tells you so! :D
    i'm glad you're handling the cravings well! but remember to indulge here and there. nobody will ever give a pregnant woman shit for eating.
    i'm glad you're taking care of the baby so well! i know you will be a great Mother that is very unlike your own Mother <3
    Whaaaaaat?! that's insane.
    as i'll say again, i hope you are doing fabulously.

    -Sam Lupin

  6. so, I hope things went well with the therapist. Sometimes it takes a while. It took me a few appointments to forge a connection with Julien, but he really has been helpful for me. Now I'm upset I'm losing him in three weeks because my insurance won't pay for any more therapy sessions for me. So give it a chance and take advantage of their knowledge. And if it doesn't work out, see if you can get a new one instead (see, that's why I like socialized European healthcare systems. You may have to wait for treatment sometimes but then there's none of this insurance refusing to pay stuff!)

    The ultrasound sounds exciting! :) and I'm glad weight stuff is keeping steady. Sorry about your family though, but hey, I know it's not the same but you have us! And you have your husband. I hope your sister and mother come around some day, but even if they don't, you've done a damn good job with your life so far without them. And you'll keep doing so! Love you!