Yesterday was a really rough day for me.. I had this routine control where you have to meet up at the nurses office fully fasted (You aren't allowed to have water even) - then they give you a huge glass of sugary water, which you need to drink within 5 minutes. Then you get to sit and wait around for 2 hours - two hours later they stick the finger take a bunch of blood samples to see how your body handles the sugar.

The levels are supposed to be under 8 - mine was 10, something.. She told me that those levels puts me in a really high danger zone for the gestational diabetes.. So she is going to send me to this diabetes clinic and see what they say... I got home.. Puked my heads off (I still had alot of disgusting sugary water in my tummy)... And then most of yesterday I was crying..

There are few factors that can put you in a higher risk zone for the diabetes.. One is being from the part of the world that I was born in... Second being overweight... The history of bulimia and binge eating is also a factor..

I know I can not do anything about where I was born - so that is that.. But the last two.. I have done to my self.. I feel just sooo horrible.. I guess the fact that during the last few weeks where I have been really sick my eats have been horrid isn't helping the matter.. The only thing I have been able to eat has been maria cookies, salt crakers, and sometimes cooked basmati with some chicken.. None of them are exactly helping you to keep your sugar levels stabil ect...

I didn't get any information from the nurse yesterday so I went online and started reading about the gestational diabetes and what can help and so on.. Apparently IF I get it, it is something that will go over of it self after the baby is born, but the woman that get the diabetes, are most likely to get diabetes type 2 later in their life..

You know.. I have had a shit life - I can deal with stuff that happen to me.. But the thing that really breaks my heart is the fact that if I do not get a hold of this - it can effect the baby.. The baby can get too much sugar through me - and become a HUGE baby - and it will most likely have issues with low blood sugar after it is born.. - I do understand that these are all IF but it didn't really calm me down yesterday..

So I started reading more about how to deal with this.. - and I have a game plan.. A whole bunch of sites were talking about how diet and when you eat can effect this.. I need to eat something every 3 hours... No skipping meals... High fiber - low sugar is the key.. No added sugar.. No more than 3 portions of fruit a day.. No white bread - pasta - ect..

I just hope this will help.. And that by the time I get to the clinic for more tests there is no need for me to do anything - or even go back..


Wish me luck.. I don't think I would EVER be able to forgive my self, if anything happenes to the baby because of my fucked up relationship with food..



  1. Don't feel so bad hun! I know it's scary but a lot of women do get gestational diabetes with even none of the risk factors that you talked about. My sister got it my nephew was born healthy and it went away after she delivered. The fact that you have a higher risk later to get type 2 just means more incentive to eat right; which is what you want to do anyways. If you watch your diet during the pregnancy everything should be okay. You will be okay. I hope you start to feel better.

  2. Dont stress about that test. A lot of women I know end up in that high risk range. My friend how is due any day has it. she got a little bigger with this baby and the baby will weigh more than her other children but really it is ok. Just focus on the task ahead which is taking care of yourself and this beautiful baby inside you. Do not take Jessica Simpsons advise on being pregnant and eating...That was a joke hope you at least smiled :) Oh and with that crap that taste like over sugared flat soda. With my first child I went though 3 bottles because they kept making me sick lol. Oh the joys of being pregnant. But promise it is worth it in the end!!

  3. that drink is so horrid and i had to be tested every six weeks with my second baby...so gross! it made me cry at the thought of having to drink it.

    i can tell you from personal experience that it will be ok and i have two healthy boys to prove it. i was on the low end levels with gestational diabetes. many many years later i still haven't shown signs of developing type 2 diabetes and both my boys are tall, lean and healthy *and of course handsome says mom*. yes, my babies were big 9.9oz and 10.1 and a half oz. with both pregnancies i put on under 25 pounds. technically, i had less personal weight to lose because they took up so much of it! so you will fare well i'm sure of it. relax as much as you can, try not to stress about it.

  4. It sounds like you're feeling very concerned about this.
    Unfortunantely, we can't change the past. So whether or not your actions have led to this, you can only do something about the future!
    I get all of your posts emailed to my inbox, and always read them. I truly know that you could deal with ANYTHING that was put your way.
    This baby will be so incredible. Gestational diabetes happens to so many mums, and as you said, it usually does go away after the pregnancy.
    I know that if need be, you will be fully able to deal with the outcome. I honestly believe that.
    Positive thinking now, girly! You are such an amazing woman! <3 <3

  5. I am familiar with the low refined carbohydrate stuff because of my PCOS, and I can say that it does regulate your appetite very well because big changes in blood sugar affect appetite, and it keeps your blood sugar more stable. There are still the emotional causes of eating to deal with, but it helps. It's also a great way to manage the blood sugar/diabetes/insulin issues long-term, pregnant or no.

    Remember that exercise increases insulin sensitivity (in other words, helps control your blood sugar) in addition to helping the placenta & baby to develop good circulation. If you end up eating something too carby, don't kick yourself over it, go out and go for a walk within an hour or two of eating. Exercise on a regular basis regardless of slip-ups. Doesn't have to be intense, just get moving. Eat well most of the time, forgive yourself and move on when you don't. You WILL be ok.