I have had enough of my self.. The fact that I keep getting bigger and heavier.. I have reached a high point that Im ashamed of..
I am ashamed of what I look like.. What I see when I look in the mirror. Of what I have become.. Ashamed of being so weak that I can't take control of my own body..
I don't need to lose a few kilos.. I need to lose alot.. Half of what I am not would be more than enough for someone with my hight and build..
I keep making my self these promisses.. Thinking that I will do this and that.. But I never manage to keep going on. Never stick to something. I always make some sort of excuse..
I am gonna get me a membership at the closest gym and start going there straight after work. No more candy.. No more junkfood.. No more overeating.. No more fat food.
Oh God please.. I beg of you.. Give me the strength to go on.. I don't want to stay this way anymore..