One of those days!

Yesterday was an ok day with food. I didn't binge, and I have only purged once since my bff went back. So I guess thats good. I think the amount of what I eat instead of combining it with what I eat way of doing the restriction. It makes it so much easier to think there are no "forbidden" foods and I can have it IF I really want it. Ofc there are limits to that, but I like to have the freedom.
Anyways, I am still way too fat. But I am not going to compare my self to many of those wonderful girls on the blogs I read. I will get there too. Slowly maybe.. But I will..

On another note.. ( I am at work to this post is getting updated VERY slowly, hehe ) .. Anyways.. I just ordered my whole wedding outfit.. It was a huge sale and suddenly poof.. I had my dress- veil- bolero- and undergarment for 1/3 of the budget I had... Like OMG!!!! They will deliver it all in a couple of weeks.. I cant wait.. ^^ I just loved the top... It's so so so cute

Here is the rest of it:
Finally... I was so tired of thinking about the dress .. So glad it's all done! Now there are only 5000 other details to look into.. hehe..

It's weird to think how fast time has been going by. It is now just under 12 weeks to the wedding. So thats 11 weeks where I can get smaller. Other than the London trip (3rd.- 6th of June) there isn't many other food related gatherings we have to attend.

- Back from my lunch break.. And I feel horrid. A tad panicky.. Too fat.. I had a chicken toast. Haven't eaten anything but that today.. But then as I was taking my last bite there was this girl.. And she was... SO SKINNY.. She was so tiny.. And wearing these tiny little shorts.. Everything about her was tiny... And I just realized (yet again) how huge I am... I am fat and I keep going on and on about eating. While I could skip lunch, I go spend money on getting me food.. And my wedding day is only weeks away. Instead of getting thin I just eat??
WTF is wrong with me?
You don't get thin by eating. You don't get thin by sitting on your fat ass... You don't get thin by wishing it.. Skinny girls don't spend time on eating every meal do day? They don't spend their money on fatty shit.. They say no thanks.. I have every chance of just not eating anything every day until I get home after work and I just do it?? What is wrong with me? Why can't I just say no?

Anyways.. I am going on the skinny girl diet. I have 23 days before London, going to start tomorrow on day 3- and keep it up to day 26. We are going to be in London from Friday till Monday, So Ill go back on day 2 from tuesday when we get back.

And yes calories from fruit will count for me.. I don't see why they shouldn't. Going to make a new page for the diet and update as it goes.

Anyone wants to join me?

Just came across this post, gonna read it.. Seems interesting

oh Edit again: 
That post seems kind of BS ish... anyways.. 


  1. You CAN get skinny and still eat. It's just a matter of eating less than usual and moving more. You can do it. Don't bring yourself down comparing yourself to others. Do what you can do and don't give up.

  2. Thanks hon... Glad this day is over.. I will do my best.. thanks

  3. Your wedding dress is absolutely gorgeous, it's so elegant! You're going to look amazing for your wedding, like a princess! Good luck on the skinny girl diet, stay beautiful! :)

  4. *I agree with seeking something else

  5. Your wedding dress is beautiful. I really like the top of it.

    I agree with what something else, you can get skinny and still eat, its a matter of eating less and eating healthier foods and moving more. I'm guilty of comparing myself to others, especially in blogger land and it brings me down so I'm trying to stop. cuz no matter what weight you are by eating better and exercising you're going to feel better and your body will change.


  6. americaneaglelove: Thanks love :) I hope so.

    And Harlow, Thanks hon. Its not always easy to not compare your self to others. Specially when you aren't happy with your self in some ways. I am trying to just think of me and my numbers and not compare my self to others, but I am far from what I used to be.. so its not exactly making things easier. But I am trying and will try harder. :)